According to the dictionary, superstition is an irrational belief arising from ignorance or fear. There are superstitions for almost all aspects of our daily lives and most have unknown origins. Sometimes they are logical (for example, “don’t walk under a ladder”) but most of the time they are just plain silly (“An acorn at the window will keep lightning out”?!–huh?). Sometimes people can even become controlled by their superstitions (“walk on a crack, break your mother’s back”–that must be SOME crack!). Here is a list of 26 (get it, 13 x 2 = 26!) weird, crazy and downright creepy superstitions:
1. If a candle blows out, evil spirits are nearby.
(Or there’s a window open somewhere.)
2. Three seagulls flying together, directly overhead, are a warning of death soon to come.
(Or poop on your head.)
3. Evil spirits can’t harm you when you stand inside a circle.
(Oh, that explains all those people walking up and down the street wearing hula hoops.)
4. If you stick your hands in your pocket while walking past a graveyard, it will protect your parents.
(Makes me wonder what happens if I turn my pockets inside out. Or if I’m wearing a dress instead of pants. Or if I choose to not be dressed at all!)
5. Never take a broom along when you move. It is bad luck. Throw it out and buy a new one.
(Isn’t that common sense? A used broom is kind of a nasty thing to box up with the linens. Like packing up used trash cans. A new broom costs like two dollars. And I wonder about the Swiffer factor–does that count as a broom?)
6. A knife placed under the bed during childbirth will ease the pain of labor.
(If I was the father, I would be very nervous.)
7. If three people are photographed together, the one in the middle will die first.
(This one must make triplets around the world very nervous)
8. A knife as a gift from a lover means that the love will soon end.
(Who wrote this one…Ted Bundy??!)
9. Place a hand in front of your mouth when sneezing so that your soul cannot escape.
(Now they tell us to sneeze into our armpits. I feel sorry for any soul that gets sneezed into an armpit.)
10. It’s bad luck to leave a house through a different door than the one used to come into it.
(I’m safe from this one. I live in an apartment and there’s ONLY one door. WHEW!)
11. Hold your breath while going past a cemetery otherwise you will breathe in the spirit of someone who has recently died .
(Um, did the person who came up with this one not realize how HUGE some cemeteries are?!…HELLO!!)
12. If a dead person’s eyes are left open he will find someone to take along with him.
(I wonder if this one counted for the members of Helen Keller’s family)
13. Dropping an umbrella on the floor is an indication of murder in the house.
(Uh, what if you’re terminally klutzy?)
14. If a clock that has not been working suddenly chimes, there will be a death in the family.
(I wonder how the members of the Timex family feel about this one.)
15. It is bad luck to light 3 cigarettes at the same time.
(Yes it is. And that bad luck is called cancer.)
16. A cricket in the house brings good luck.
(It will also brings cricket poop.)
17. The number of Xs in the palm of your right hand is the number of children you will have.
(I counted. I will have 53 children.)
18. A loaf of bread should never be turned upside down after a slice has been cut from it.
(Unless the bread is stale and you’re making bread crumbs out of it.)
19. If you catch a falling leaf on the first day of autumn you will not catch a cold all winter.
How about if the whole tree falls on you in winter?)
20. You should never start a trip on a Friday or you will meet misfortune.
(Well, there goes my long weekend trip to Atlantic City!)
21. If a friend gives you a knife, you should give him a coin, or your friendship will soon be broken.
(Unless that friend’s name is Charles Manson, then run like hell!)
22. The number 13.
(It’s just a number. Yet, some people actually refuse to get out of bed on Friday the 13th. Many airports don’t have a gate #13. (Like the folks at 12A won’t figure it out.) Many hotels don’t have a 13th floor. I remember reading somewhere that the superstition of the number 13 is based on the idea that Judas, the bad disciple, was the 13th man to sit down to the table at The Last Supper. I think a more rational superstition would be to fear bad disciples.)
23. Salty soup is a sign that the cook is in love.
(I’ve actually checked the sodium levels on some of the food in my local grocery…gee, there’s an awful lot of love out there.)
24. A bird in the house is a sign of a death.
(And here I thought the saying is, “a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.” Hmm…)
25. A horseshoe hung in the bedroom will keep nightmares away.
(That is however, unless said horsehoe is hanging over your bed, falls on your head and gives you a concussion.)
26. Counting six crows will cause death.
(I wonder if this is how that old singing group Counting Crows came up with their name
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